I’m back with an AWESOME piece from yet another friend. Thank God for ‘unusual’ friends
Let me begin with a quote of a friend of mine.
“You DO NOT DO empathy”
That was what he told me when I told him I was going to do an article on Empathy.
Truth be told, he was right.
In a world where everything is fast paced, you keep on moving or get pushed out of the way. It is so easy to get caught in that zombie traffic. The reckless continuity of work-to-home, home-to-church and vice-versa. Each day, we pass by tons of people, we utter “Good Morning” as though barking out an order for them to get out of the way. Or maybe, I’m the only one who does these things.
At any rate, the need for constant motion may often swallow the need for frequent reflection.
There is a beggar on my route to work, an old man. He has complete sets of hands and feet, and each day on the same spot, he sits and asks for money as I pass by.
I pass him by a lot.
Until, one day I hear myself say, God cares for the poor regardless their religion.
At this point, I stopped. And I gave him money. And I remember, “God cares for the poor, regardless their religion“
Care is the one thing that drives connection. I will explain. Care forces us to do one thing, it forces us to FEEL. To feel the pain of another, to feel the wisdom in words, to feel the affection in actions…
“To FEEL” causes us to abandon our own point of reference, beliefs, neediness and to take up another’s position. To see life through their eyes. Not to slightly alter our perspective and accommodate theirs… but to abandon totally, and see it from their eyes.
This taking up someone else’s view point, is called Empathy. And it is Empathy that helps us relate to someone else’s pain. This is the relation that drives connection between two parties. This is the bind that ties good relationships.
When we care, we can reach people. We can touch them and the FEELING of connection itself satisfies us.
I’m not sure if it is possible to care without loving, maybe it is, I’m not sure. But I am sure it is impossible to LOVE without CARING.
Feeling may not always be pleasant. Do it anyways, it drives connection. For to numb, drives disconnection.
After I gave the beggar, he said “thanks”. And these words came to mind…
“I’ll bless those who bless you”
Genesis 12:3
That’s when I realized, because I gave to him that day and he blessed, so many more will give to him. As a result, the first act of giving and thankfulness, made a beggar have, and made him blessed.
My word of encouragement is this. Reflect, Care, for the ones you love, and the one’s you don’t. Care, because it is good for you to FEEL.
Feel, Gbenga.
Written By: Ajiboye Gbenga (@the_horoatio)
http://www.thesavvynigerian.blogspot.com
And to think I was the one that said “You DO NOT DO empathy” (I should be ashamed of myself).
There you have it people. Let’s get back to connecting with people. That is the vehicle of Love.
Amadeus Diary 